What if happiness is a skill?

What if happiness is not a set of circumstance? What if happiness is a skill set that can be learned and then executed in any situation? What would that skill set look like and how would you develop it? Is happiness really just building a tool kit and knowing how to use the tools?

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~ Use kind words

My mother used to scoff at people when they said “Count to ten when you are angry.” Her reply went something like this, “Don’t bother counting to ten. Instead say 25 kind words and your mind will go in a different direction.”

Now I challenge you to stop reading right now and write down 25 kind words. If you can do it, please leave them in a comment. The world needs more lists of kind words.

~ Make friends with change

Change is consistent. It is going to happen. Even if you are thrilled with the most current change, it will expire, and be replaced someday. So greet change with a smile, enjoy it while it lasts and give it a fond farewell when it goes.

~ Foster a sense of wonderment and curiosity

As long as you can keep a sense of wonder you will learn. Are you amazed how many seeds come from a single dandelion? Are you surprised when several evenings in a row you see the best sunsets ever? Those are great examples of wonderment.

Curiosity is similar in some ways. How did that happen? Why is that there? Where did that come from and where will it go? As long as you have the curiosity of a child, you will be able to find happiness.

~ Embrace acceptance

Once you realize “it is what it is”, you have a starting point. You know exactly where you are,what you are and you accept it. From there, you can say “it is what it is and it doesn’t always have to be that way” and become whatever you are willing to change.

Have you ever considered happiness may be a skill set that applies to any situation? I really must continue to ponder the thought.

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31 thoughts on “What if happiness is a skill?

  1. I am still struggle with the whole idea. LOL. Time will tell if I get it. Thanks for all your time and comments. It is much appreciated.

  2. What a lovely post. We aren’t born unhappy but sadly we lose our childlike joy as we get older and become more cynical. Lots to ponder.

  3. Not sure if Happiness is a skill, but it’s definitely a choice, we have full control of our attitude.Here is an A-Z of kind words 😉 adorable beautiful charming delightful elegant fabulous generous happy impressive jovial knowledgeable legendary marvelous natural optimistic phenomenal quality remarkable sparkling transformative upbeat vibrant vivacious wondrous yummy zeal 😉

  4. Oh my gosh! Have I told you today Mike that you are amazing! I am making a poster as we speak.

  5. Here goes.
    Beautiful, wonderful, awesome,exponential (I know weak but my favourite word) kind, graceful, generous, skilled, empathetic, powerful, empowered, gentle, angelic, sweet, loving, loved, grounded, encouraging, abundant, caring, sensitive, soulful, truthful, powerful, humorous. Thank you for this reminder

  6. Adorable
    Beautiful
    Collaborative
    Determined
    Empathy
    Fun
    Generous
    Honest
    Insightful
    Jovial
    Kind
    Loving
    Motivating
    Nurturing
    Observant
    Persevering
    Qualified
    Resilient
    Strong
    Truthful
    Unique
    Vibrant
    Wise
    X-?
    Youthful
    Zealous

  7. Wow – what a great idea to ask for 25 kind words! Would love to see the complete collection you gather! I’m going for: Loving, generous, kind, caring, joyful, brilliant, gorgeous, talented, warm, fabulous, empathetic, thoughtful, sincere, considerate, loyal, charming, awesome, beautiful, compassionate, calming, insightful, grounded, radiant, creative, fun.

  8. Great feel good post. I have to agree with your mum, there’s nothing like feel good thoughts to make you feel good.

  9. Great post, Trenna! Neuroscience teaches us that there are activities (such as mindfulness, which I am a huge advocate for) which can fuel happiness. Pleasurable activities and those kind words can also give us and others a hit of dopamine ( also known as the ‘happy hormone’), the neurotransmitter that drives our brain’s reward system.

    Thanks for that great tip. I will swap my counting to 10 to saying 25 kind words.

    Keep up the great work!

  10. Great post, Trenna! Neuroscience teaches us that there are activities (such as mindfulness, which I am a huge advocate for) which can fuel happiness. Pleasurable activities and those kind words can also give us and others a hit of dopamine ( also known as the ‘happy hormone’), the neurotransmitter that drives our brain’s reward system.

    Thanks for that great tip. I will swap my counting to 10 to saying 25 kind words.

    Keep up the great work!

  11. Oh goodness, my 25 words are in sentences! “Thank you. I love you. What a beautiful thing to do. I appreciate you. Have a great day. How are YOU today? I’m here for you. Smile!”

    Last fall, I took a free course online through edX called The Science of Happiness, and it has helped me increase my happiness level! Wonderment and awe–I take more time now to appreciate the little things that are so powerful, like beautiful sunsets!

  12. Its funny when I first read this post i was like 25 that easy but now i’m trying it, it’s soooo hard. All I could think of was;

    Kind
    Happy
    Lovely
    Beautiful
    Nice
    Amazing
    Pretty
    Calm
    Enjoyment
    Wonderful
    Thank You

    Ok I give up. I do agree that happiness, is much more a mind set then anything else. I’m currently on my own personal journey of happiness. Thank you for such for a wonderful post

  13. Loved this post, yes to certain extent i agree happiness is a skill, one needs to practice it everyday to remain constantly happy; but also agree its a concious decision made to stay happy, to bounce back, to forgive and let go, to appreciate the beauty around, to keep smiling, to be grateful and practice gratitude and above all to be open for new learnings and constantly loving, accepting and forgiving oneself. Last but not the least to inspire and be inspired and make a difference wherever we are positively contributing to make this world a better place…

  14. travelwithmrst,

    It is odd, I don’t consider myself an optimist at all. I am a realist to the 10th degree. There are often times when I call on others to help me see the lighter side. Thank you.

  15. loveyourzcarlz.

    It is hard to come up with 25 isn’t it. You all been so gracious to provide words. I appreciate it and good luck on your journey.

  16. ladyvermeulen,
    I read this to my husband and he said I needed a new tool box. He is probably right! lol.

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